This month is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness month. I am participating in a month long healing event called "Capture Your Grief", organized by CarlyMarie Project Heal. Each day of the month there is a prompt for taking a photo & writing/journaling. Today the prompt is honor. In honor of.
Introducing a peek at Arabella Grace Lawson.
I am fiercely protective of her. And of the 188 photos that I have of her. But I want to give you a little peek at her. So you will know just how real she is to me. Why my empty arms ache. Why my heart breaks every single day.
This is my daughter.
At approximately 8:21pm on Sunday, July 12th her heart quit beating.
Her heart had been beating just three awful contractions before that.
In a moment, she was just gone.
Less than one hour later, she was born still.
She weighed 1 pound, 1 ounce.
She was 10 inches long.
She had the start of curly blonde hair.
Her nose was probably the cutest one I'd ever seen.
She was so so tiny, but utterly perfect.
And I miss her. Every single second of every single day. Some days I'm not completely sure how I put one foot in front of the other.
But I do. Because I have to. Because I want to. Because this tiny person impacted my life in such a big way.
She made me a mama. And I will honor that for the rest of my days.