Sunday, July 5, 2015

An Update


We had our appointment with the high risk OB last week.  He gave Arabella Grace less than a 10% chance of survival after delivery.  If I'm honest, everything about how he delivered the results pointed more towards a 0% chance in his mind...but of course stated that he doesn't deal in absolutes.

What he confirmed from the ultrasound is that there is actually no fluid around her, which presents multiple problems for her lungs.  Mostly...there is just no way for them to develop.  He showed us where there are spots on her kidneys...what he believes to be cysts.  And he confirmed the first diagnosis from last month...thickened heart walls & fluid around the right side of the heart.  She is also about 3 weeks behind in size.

In all my life, I've never been so heart broken.  I have prayed & longed for this little life for such a long time...the fact that she could be taken from me makes it hard to breathe.

With that being said, I'm not giving up on her.  I know medically the statistics are grim.  But I believe in an all powerful God of healing & hope, who truly has the final decision.  I have to trust in Him, and His plan.  Without that, this would be even more unbearable than it already is.  There is a song that says "I will praise you in this storm", and that is where I am at.  Sometimes my prayers only come in the form of tears, but my God knows my heart.

Please keep us in your prayers.  This is a really scary & hard time for all of us...especially me.

35 comments:

  1. I've been wondering. thanks so much for sharing. I am so very very sorry that you and your husband and baby are going through this. I hope, as you do, for the best. I will be thinking of all of you. HUGS.

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  2. Lea I will continue to pray for you and your baby girl. Huge HUGS.

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  3. Prayers lifted and sending hugs to you also.

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  4. Big hugs to you and hubby! What a terrible thing to have to go through. I'll keep you and baby in my thoughts and prayers.

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  5. You are all in my thoughts and prayers.

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  6. I can't imagine how hard it is for you to deal with this. Hugs and prayers.

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  7. Continuing to think and pray about your family. I'm so sorry for the crushing news.

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  8. I will continue to pray for you and your family.....

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  9. Thanks for the difficult update. I will pray for the all.

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  10. Prayers and love. Thinking of you and the baby.

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  11. Praying for you. I don't know if you mentioned this before and you probably know, but Arabella means "answer to prayer."

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  12. I'm so very sorry to hear this news. Words cannot express the sadness that I feel for you and your husband. Hang on with whatever outcome. My prayers and thoughts are with you.

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  13. Oh, such heartbreaking news to receive. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers.

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  14. Oh Lea - my heart breaks for and with you! Having walked a dark and scary time in our lives (not the same, but they are all hard in their own way) - I am so encouraged by your steadfast trust in the Lord through it all. Praying that He holds you close to Him through this, and that you never doubt the love He has for you. And praying for a miracle for you and your sweet girl! Sending love and hugs to you all!

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  15. I absolutely believe you when you say it is hard for you to breathe. I cannot begin to imagine. Praying that the Lord will sustain you and your husband and extended family as you walk through this valley. We pray that His kind will would be to spare your precious Arabella and give you a miracle.

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  16. So sorry, Lea. I can't begin to know how you feel, but this lady does. http://angiesmithonline.com/audreys-story/
    I don't know if it will be at all helpful to you to read her story sometime.
    Praying for your family to have the peace which surpasses all understanding.

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  17. Oh, Lea, my heart breaks for you and your family. I teared up just reading your post. Praying for a miracle for little Arabella. God is good and prayers have been answered before so why not now? Will keep you and your dear ones in my prayers as you endure the struggle ahead. Sometimes life is just SO unfair. Sending hugs & prayers your way!

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  18. Praying for you during this difficult time. Praying for peace and a miracle.

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  19. I wish I had words, Lea. I'm praying. 💛

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  20. keeping you close in thought and prayer, Lea. (((hugs)))

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  21. Been thinking of you lots, Leah. Thank you for sharing this difficult update. May His perfect peace surround you and supernatural grace fill your heart and soul. Praying for your sweet, little miracle. Hugs!

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  22. Just seeing this for the first time. Wish I could give you a big hug and a shoulder to cry upon. Sending you lots of prayers and positive thoughts.

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  23. You've been on my mind so much, Lea. Continuing to pray for you during this difficult time.

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  24. Lea, sending you and your family big hugs. You are all in my thoughts. xoxox <3

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  25. I've been waiting for an update and this is not what I expected to read. I am heartbroken for you. Your update made me cry. I have put you (anonymously, as God knows your needs) on the prayer chain at church. God has the final say in everything. I pray that God touches the hands of the doctors and that Arabella is supernaturally healed and so are you and your husband, no matter what the outcome is. Never give up Lea. Document your pregnancy, enjoy it. Take pictures, cherish her kicks, journal, and I know you are praying over her every second of every day. God will get you through this because He's the only one who can. Love, hugs and blessings to you.

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  26. Thinking of you and lifting you up in prayer. Much love to you and your family.

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  27. I've just looked you up to see the update, Lea. Your love for Arabella shines through every tear, every word you write here. May God's love and arms uphold you every day and give you strength for this difficult journey. Praying for you!

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  28. Sure do love you! I admire your strength and grace and pray for a miracle!
    Melissa

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  29. There is nothing I can say to take the pain away... But you guys are in my prayers.

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  30. My heart breaks for you Lea. Stay strong! Will pray for you, your hubby and Arabella Grace.

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Hugs & ♥,
Lea